Rainy afternoon

I?m a little overwhelmed. You know when you take everyone else?s stuff and take it into yourself and then all of a sudden you realize you?re walking around angry and resentful and it?s no one else?s fault but your own? That?s me.

Jim?s off tomorrow, which is good. He?s feeling pretty overwhelmed at work. Staying home with the kids and the animals and the pool will do him some good. I have a doctor?s appointment and I need to run some errands which is good because getting away from the house and the kids and the animals will do me some good.

I?ve been shirking a lot of my responsibilities and just sort of focusing on the needs of the live creatures, blowing off the dusting, vacuuming, etc. I haven?t even started Jim?s follow up work and I know he?s a little annoyed, but he?s being pretty good about it. I just can?t seem to work up the enthusiasm for it. All I?m really in the mood to do is curl up with a good book and turn the world off. I don?t know whether it?s a good or a bad thing, but when I read a good book, it?s easy for me to turn off the noises around me. That?s pretty much why I didn?t read much fiction when the kids were babies. I wouldn?t hear them calling if I was caught up in a good story. I found that reading non-fiction wouldn?t have that effect on me, so that?s what I read. Now that they?re older, it?s better because if they really need me, they?re pretty insistent and they?re able to come stand in my face and get my attention. Can you say escapism? I thought you could.

Outside the window, the rain is softly falling, and I can hear the thunder rolling off in the distance. It?s a very comforting sort of sound. Not at all startling like most of the thunder storms here, but more like what it sounded like when I was small and my great-grandmother used to tell me that the angels were bowling. It?s the perfect soundtrack for a nap.

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