I hate August. Not the weather, I like it hot. But the anniversaries. one anniversary in particular.
I’ve kept journals for years and I always write a lot in August, so many things come to the surface in August. Not that it’s not on my mind all the rest of the year as well, but there’s something that happens when you near the date of an event, be it joyful or tragic, that somehow makes it seem closer, more raw. Also, I’ve never kept a journal that other people read, though and I’m not sure that I’m open to writing about this stuff where other people will possibly read it.

All through the month of August I’m moody. My husband is especially gentle in August, my father disappears and doesn’t really resurface till September. My mother cries. I hold my children a little bit closer and I remember.

It’s been almost 15 years and the pain never goes away. The ache where the person used to be never goes away. They say that time heals all wounds, but it’s not true. It’s just that with the passage of time there are longer intervals between breakdowns.

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I haven’t done the Friday Five in weeks. So, here goes!

1. What is your lineage? Where are your ancestors from? Ireland mostly (Dublin on my mother’s side, County Cork on my father’s. Although Austria, Hungary and Poland do figure in. Interestingly enough, what we thought was an Italian lineage turned out to be Polish. (Long story, insert Polish joke here)

2. Of those countries, which would you most like to visit? Ireland. I have friends there, family there that I’ve never met. Although my second cousin went there to research the family tree and said the patriarch of the family in Dublin was a dead ringer for my mother’s father. That would be interesting to explore.

3. Which would you least like to visit? Why? I would like to visit all of them. If I had to choose – I guess I’d say Poland as we have no idea what the family name was (insert another Polish joke here) and I never knew that we were of Polish descent, so I didn’t grow up thinking about it.

4. Do you do anything during the year to celebrate or recognize your heritage? I drink alot.. no, I’m kidding. But yes, we do celebrate being Irish. Not just on St. Patty’s Day though. We always have little rituals and traditions that figure in to a lot of the holidays over the year.

5. Who were the first ancestors to move to your present country (parents, grandparents, etc)? I’m fifth generation American. The Irish and Austrian immigrants are really the only ones I know anything about.

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