As I threatened in a previous post, today I’m going to write more about my end of year process, and although I planned to break this down in more bite size pieces, the year is getting away from me. Use what you like, leave the rest. It is, after all a buffet (insert Auntie Mame reference here).
After I finish with my “Values” list, I move on to “Roles”. Each of us performs many different functions or roles in our everyday life. They might be Mother, Spouse, Sister, Daughter, Employee, Boss, Designer, the list could go on forever. I used to try to really cover every single role that I play in my life, but over the years I’ve tried to just think about the roles that are most important to me at that particular time. The constants have always been mother and wife, but the others change from year to year. This year the top of the list is Self – I know that I need to make myself a priority for 2009 – as the old adage states, “if mama aint happy, ain’t nobody happy” and I see the truth in it. So, let’s use “Self” as our example.
Role: Self
People who relate to this role: Me
And again, as with “Values”, I write a clarifying statement to set my intention. I might state: I make time to care for and nurture myself, my interests and my needs. (That is in fact what I wrote this year)
Another Role might be;
Role: Mother
People who relate to this role: Travis, Haley
Statement: I make sure that my children have what they need to grow into the incredible human beings they’re meant to be. You can flesh it out a little more, stating specific things you want to do in regard to this role, but I found that I know exactly what I’m doing differently in 2009 for my children – so this was sufficient.
Again, really all I’m doing is setting my intention, putting down on paper the things that are important to me, that I want to focus my attention on in the coming year. I’ve limited myself to six roles this year. There could be hundreds, but I tend to be distracted easily, so I’m trying to keep it simple.
The next step is my personal favorite. It’s the Be, Do, Have list and many different practices utilize this list. Basically you break the page down into three sections: Be, Do and Have. And you start listing things. First you make a list of all the things you want to “Be” – really go crazy, explore everything that comes up, do you want to be a rockstar? a politician? a writer? content? admired? fit? happy? spiritual? spontaneous? Whether it’s a career choice, a hobby, or just an emotion, list them. When you’re done, move on to “Do”: Do you want to coach a basketball team? Run a marathon? Campaign for a candidate (or be a candidate)? get a part in a local theater production? learn Portugese, learn trigonometry, again – whatever your heart desires. When you’re done with that, move on to “Have”: There is no limit here – we’re talking about the goals that you’re vocal about and the wishes that you don’t even say aloud. A new dishwasher? a jet? a big, fat, healthy retirement account? privacy? 10 minutes alone at the end of each day? a meditation room? studio? I can’t stress how important it is to only write what you really want, not what you think you should want, or what someone else tells you that you have to want. This is about you.
I save these pages from year to year and going over them, you’d be surprised how many things on these lists I have achieved or are close to achieving – Call it whatever you want, the law of attraction, or determination, whatever… this practice really makes a difference.
The last step I take is to sit down, quietly with all of this information and reread it, really paying attention to everything I’ve written over the last few exercises and I construct the year’s mission statement. My mission statement looks different every year. Sometimes it’s a long missive that I read whenever I feel the need to – sometimes its 10 lines that I hang up on my bulletin board, but every year it’s the basic road map to my goals. Your mission statement should look however you want it to look – there is no wrong way. (I think I’ve said that before).
This year is my eighth year doing this and I’ve gone from strictly following the Franklin Covey plan to creating my own rituals and questions and thoughts. Putting things down on paper, or typing them in a word processing document has made all the difference for me. I think sharing this publicly might become part of my yearly ritual – it has made me feel this process even more deeply than before.
Again, let me stress that I’d love to hear from you about what you’re doing (leave a comment or use the form if you prefer a little privacy), or if you’ve used some of these ideas on your journey. I truly feel like 2009 is going to be a great year. It might not be the most financially abundant year we’ve ever had, but that might not be so bad. Maybe there are other lessons to be learned this year. I know, for my family it’s giving us the opportunity to look at the other ways in which we have abundance in our life. My wish is that you find abundance and peace in your life as well.
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